Did a friend forward this to you? Subscribe here.

this week: 🔥 burnout

🎧 listen here (13 mins).
scroll
for supplemental updates.

hi there,

Last I was in your inbox, I was on holiday in Spain. And since that trip, I’ve been unexpectedly feeling far from enthusiastic and energetic.

In the past seven weeks, I’ve been feeling stuck, confused, and lost.

The irony is that I fled the corporate world last year thinking that I’d be free of these types of feelings. After all, that was where I felt I most purposeless in my life. So, I left. I began a new chapter to create my purpose and a business aligned to it in an effort to living a better, more creative life.

🚨NEWS FLASH: Nine months after quitting her job, Sorah burns out again!

fire out.gif

This time, my burnout wasn’t related to work at all. In fact, it pertained to every part of my personal life.

Truthfully, I’ve been in denial that my burnout was rooted in my personal matters. And for a long time, I believed burnout could only happen at work where I hid my truest self. It’s the place where I made great efforts to mask my biggest fears like feeling shame when I “failed” or hurt when asshole bosses were less than kind, which then led me to overcompensating and working like a maniac. Hence, the burnout. I thought, because I showed up truer in my personal life and got rid of the work part that burned me out before, that I eliminated my chances of burning out again.

Well, I was wrong:
My personal life is on the struggle bus, and I’m really burned out.

The uncomfortable truth is that getting my brand management agency off the ground has been incredibly slow. I always prided myself on being efficient and getting things done. But the pendulum has swung the other way, and I’ve been emotionally and mentally paralyzed, unable to put my finger on why.

So, as of a couple weeks ago, I started working with a coach to support me.

What I’m confronting right now is my fatal attraction to intensity.

I admit that I have zero skill in balancing my energy, and I only know how to live in the extremes. I’m having trouble carrying both work and personal matters in a healthy, manageable way. Before this experience, all of my energy poured into my career and my personal life was on the back-burner. Today, it’s the other way around. The difference is that, unlike a corporate job, I can’t just quit my personal life.

Some days, I spent it sprawled out on my couch, barely able to peel myself off of it. Other days, like yesterday, I had the tenacity to stay focused, one task at a time. Maybe this is a part of the transition of going from corporate to full self-employment. Whatever it is… I’m working on it day-by-day.

Today, I have no lessons to highlight or an intelligent quote to reference. I simply wanted to share my state of being and keep myself honest. Thank you for allowing me to use this space for that 💙. If you are burned out, too — I hope this gives you some comfort that you’re not alone.

‘Til next time.

-Sorah

 

other updates:

  1. Uimi, my boutique brand management agency is now open for business! We serve socially-conscious brands (or those that aspire to be) with branding and marketing services. 📣 Please spread the word!

  2. Currently reading: Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely

  3. Recently read and recommended:
    All About Love by Bell Hooks
    All You Can Ever Know by Nicole Chung
    Success and Luck: Good Fortune and the Myth of Meritocracy by Robert H. Frank

  4. Went to a workshop on the Enneagram (for the second time): Excavating Your Ego. Highly recommended to check out. Next one is in early-October.

Want to hire me as a consultant or book me as speaker? Email me.